Wow, Wow...It has been a while!

So I was reading a friend's blog today and I realized just how long it has been since I have posted. Her post got me thinking about some things and I wanted to elaborate and update you guys about life at The Hill. So may this officially stand as my apology for becoming one of 'those bloggers' that becomes completely absent for a while. May I not wait so long to post next time.

Well a few changes have been made on The Hill. All the cows are gone. It really feels different without them being there, it's just a big open field now. I almost miss those cattle.

I've decided to not sell Mary Kay, it turned out to be more of a hassle than a blessing but if anyone would like to order anything I still have some awesome friends that sell it and would be happy to assist you.

As of late I have been doing a lot of ruminating over ideals and expectations. I thought when I got married at 21 that things would be different than they are right now. I'm not saying that things aren't, how can I say this, wonderful as they are; but my expectations have had to adjust.

By now, I thought we would be expecting a little one as did a lot of people obviously because when I see some people one of the things they have to ask is, "When are y'all going to have a little one?" DH and I both want kids, we honestly want a few but right now we know we can not financially support a child. When you tell people this fact you get comments like, "You will never 'Be Ready' you just have to do the best you can?" Well I refuse to just get by. I want the best for my future kids. I don't believe that God wants us to struggle to have a family. I have enjoyed the last 2 years and 10 months with my husband. Honestly, since we have been married, only about 2 months out of that time have we not had someone else living in our home with us. Sometimes this frustrates me. DH and I have discussed this fact also and we have learned to love sacrificially. I have come to the realization that sharing our home with our family is a blessing. We don't know how much time we will have with these parents and grandparents. The time we've had them living in our home is quality time we wouldn't have shared and should be graciously appreciated. Yes, some days we struggle because we've never really had our space to ourselves, but we also realize that if we have kids in the near future we will be giving up even more of our space too. I also did not expect to feel cramped in a 3BR/2Ba Single Wide, but many days cramped is exactly what I feel. I thought my home would stay neat and organized at all times but it doesn't. I see friends and family members in these big fancy houses and I get a little jealous but then I remind myself that my home is paid off and that theirs will probably keep them in debt for 20+ years. I also did not expect to still be working night shift 6 months after graduating from college, but there I remain. I love my job I get to meet lots of interesting people and I get lots of quiet time and I can do personal things like blog during work time. We've decided that when we do have children we are going to home school so I have been gathering resources during my work hours (Check out my board "Teaching Toolbox" on Pinterest). It's been very productive time for me.

I know that God does everything for a reason and He has a plan and a purpose for everything. As I was reading my friend's blog I was reminded that sometimes I let my wants get in the way of God's plan for me. Then I was reminded of Isiah 40:31, "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up on wings as eagles, they shall run and not grow weary, they shall walk and not faint." My prayer is that the Lord teach me to wait on Him. His timing is perfect, and He is always working for my good so why don't I let Him do His job. I thought about that random kid in Walmart the week before Christmas and how he/she wants every toy they see. Often this leads to a tantrum when the parent won't buy the toy but this is only because the child forgets that Christmas is a week away. We often act like this towards God, we see something we want and when we don't get it in our timing we throw tantrums with Him. We often forget that all God wants is us to wait on Him. He knows when the right time is and He will give us exactly what we need when we need it. So this week I encourage you to find contentment in Him and be patient. He has a plan, and all things are perfect in His time.